TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

Andrew momentarily forgets that he’s podcasting and spends much too much time talking about doormats. More importantly, he and Luke look back at the extraordinary life and career of Quincy Jones. And Ed Sheeran wins a copyright lawsuit accusing him of borrowing too heavily from Lets Get It On.

Yesterday, Luke dared to venture where few are brave enough to tread: A Spirit Halloween store in downtown Chicago at 5:30pm on Halloween night.

It’s the 2024 TBTL Halloween Spooktacular! Genevieve joins Luke and Andrew to discuss her best and worst Halloween costumes over the years and to help Luke brainstorm ideas for his own getup tonight. And we hear from Tens of listeners who share their own hair-raising tales of ghostly presences and messages from the beyond.

Luke and Andrew wax nostalgic about the water parks of their youth, from Turtle Beach to Wild Waves. They also pour an oily cup of coffee out for the Starbucks Oleato, a drink idea that never stood a chance.

TBTL brings you more statues in the news! Another sarcastic sculpture has popped-up in the US Capital. Plus, NBA All-Star Dwayne Wade also got his own statue this week. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look too much like him.

Luke finally explains the strange selfie he took last week that ended up on the TBTL website, and the reveal is better than Andrew expected. They also talk about a story from the sports world that is not about sport, but about the human condition (and when NOT to start taunting people.) And a new statue of a pile of poop in the U.S. The Capitol is surprisingly above-board.

Andrew went glasses shopping yesterday and ended up having an overly emotional response to the whole process. Meanwhile, Luke made a huge stride in creating boundaries around life and work…AND he came up with a great idea for a Halloween costume with his girlfriend.

Luke is in love with a door, but he’s not in love with the new check-in system at a historic Los Angeles hotel. He and Andrew also argue about garbage collectors and their white wax pens.

Luke and Andrew bond over a radio commercial that has been making them each very angry. Plus, a new toilet technology will record your bowel movements for health purposes, but also raises some logistical and ethical issues. And Chick-Fil-A is finally in the podcast business.

Andrew is having a tech issue that may actually be more of a mental health issue. Luke has a new hi-tech neck pillow for his redeye flight to New York. And a listener shares a special recording she made with her family.

Luke and Andrew realize that yesterday was an auspicious day in TBTL history. Plus, Andrew is preparing to say goodbye to a favorite t-shirt, and Luke remembers the life and times of Tony Ventrella, who’s passing this weekend gave Luke a lot to think about.

Luke and Andrew discuss cutesy terms for crimes that make them seem less crime-y. They also celebrate a recent awe-inspiring dance party at a political rally. And they talk about a famous chess player’s amazing attempts to cheat (allegedly!) at a recent match.

Luke and Andrew discuss current trends in below-the-waist fashion, noisy stomachs, glasses with built-in cameras, and what travel would be like if they were so rich they didn’t know what to do with all their money.

Andrew had a transformative experience booking a haircut last week. Luke is rolling the dice on taking a red-eye flight directly to a gig. And the Tens of listeners help Luke identify the mystery WWII movie that he only remembered one small scene from.

After hearing about controversy surrounding today’s Wordle puzzle, Luke tries to solve the game himself on the podcast. (Spoiler alerts are duly noted on the show!) He and Andrew also discuss a creepy new A.I. tool that turns complicated text into a chatty podcast.

Luke offers an important apology involving the sports text chain that he shares with Andrew. They also discuss the closing of the last significant K-Mart in America and the deep sadness that a New York Times photographer was able to capture in its aisles.

Francis Ford Coppola has weighed-in on his own controversial film, Megalopolis, by giving it five stars on Letterboxd. So that’s good! Luke and Andrew also discuss Luke’s attempt to avoid Seahawks game spoilers while he was at work last night, and the moral quandary it left Andrew in.

Ludacris is on a mission to “the world’s most hydrated motherf***er”, but he’s going about it in an unusual way. Quantas Airlines apologizes for airing an R-rated movie on a flight. And Andrew discovers a steamy movie of his own in a surprising place.

Luke and Andrew dissect Kamala Harris’s appearance on the Howard Stern Show -- specifically, the brilliantly stupid (or stupidly brilliant) music Howard chose to introduce her. They also discuss a bizarre murder attempt involving an elaborate disguise and a vaccine ruse.

Luke and Andrew reconnect with the JibJab website to find out what the folks over there have been up to. Plus, Luke struggles over an imaginary job offer from the NFL, Andrew struggles with his memories of Browns fandom, and a listener shares a terribly sad story about her fish.