The Cosmic Custodian
Christopher Turner
This audiobook is narrated by a digital voice.
Brian Mopton lived and died by a simple creed: a place for everything, and everything in its place. So when he was resurrected as the sentient starship Custodian Vessel 734, he was horrified to learn his new, eternal job was to clean up the entire universe.
Armed with a crew of his own slightly-defective clones—a cynical detective, a hyperactive engineer, and a bureaucrat who communicates exclusively in triplicate—and a reality-bending boy who's their newest apprentice, Brian tackles the cosmos's most inconvenient spills, from misplaced socks to misfiled solar flares.
But a new threat has emerged from the void: the anti-custodians, a terrifying force of absolute tidiness dedicated to erasing every colorful, chaotic, and beautiful story from existence, leaving nothing but a perfect, sterile gray.
Faced with an enemy that hates messes, Brian and his team must embrace a new, terrifying directive: creative vandalism. They become a bookmobile for the cosmos, traveling to the quietest corners of the universe not to clean, but to make a glorious, joyful mess.
The Cosmic Custodian is a hilarious and heartfelt adventure for anyone who believes that the universe is a beautiful, chaotic place, and that sometimes, the only way to save it is to spill a little paint, play some loud music, and leave things a little messier than you found them.
Duration - 11h 24m.
Author - Christopher Turner.
Narrator - Digital Voice Madison G.
Published Date - Tuesday, 21 January 2025.
Copyright - © 2025 The App Brewery Ltd ©.
Location:
United States
Networks:
Christopher Turner
Digital Voice Madison G
The App Brewery Ltd
English Audiobooks
Findaway Audiobooks
Description:
This audiobook is narrated by a digital voice. Brian Mopton lived and died by a simple creed: a place for everything, and everything in its place. So when he was resurrected as the sentient starship Custodian Vessel 734, he was horrified to learn his new, eternal job was to clean up the entire universe. Armed with a crew of his own slightly-defective clones—a cynical detective, a hyperactive engineer, and a bureaucrat who communicates exclusively in triplicate—and a reality-bending boy who's their newest apprentice, Brian tackles the cosmos's most inconvenient spills, from misplaced socks to misfiled solar flares. But a new threat has emerged from the void: the anti-custodians, a terrifying force of absolute tidiness dedicated to erasing every colorful, chaotic, and beautiful story from existence, leaving nothing but a perfect, sterile gray. Faced with an enemy that hates messes, Brian and his team must embrace a new, terrifying directive: creative vandalism. They become a bookmobile for the cosmos, traveling to the quietest corners of the universe not to clean, but to make a glorious, joyful mess. The Cosmic Custodian is a hilarious and heartfelt adventure for anyone who believes that the universe is a beautiful, chaotic place, and that sometimes, the only way to save it is to spill a little paint, play some loud music, and leave things a little messier than you found them. Duration - 11h 24m. Author - Christopher Turner. Narrator - Digital Voice Madison G. Published Date - Tuesday, 21 January 2025. Copyright - © 2025 The App Brewery Ltd ©.
Language:
English
Chapter 2: A Mop in Need of Hands
Duration:00:09:42
Chapter 3: The Perils of Middle Management
Duration:00:08:23
Chapter 4: A Hostile Takeover of the Suggestion Box
Duration:00:08:19
Chapter 5: Crisis Management by Committee
Duration:00:10:39
Chapter 6: Debriefing and Decontamination
Duration:00:09:18
Chapter 7: The Scenery is Also a Health Hazard
Duration:00:06:52
Chapter 8: The Bucket and the Bureaucracy
Duration:00:07:59
Chapter 9: Hostile Negotiations with a Cleaning Supply
Duration:00:07:20
Chapter 10: The Inefficiency of Brute Force
Duration:00:06:48
Chapter 11: The Commute is Also a Metaphor
Duration:00:07:18
Chapter 12: The Alibi of the Abyss
Duration:00:08:04
Chapter 13: A New Item on the To-Do List
Duration:00:07:22
Chapter 14: The Unwritten Void
Duration:00:06:43
Chapter 15: Following the Breadcrumbs
Duration:00:06:52
Chapter 16: The Big One That Didn't Get Away
Duration:00:07:41
Chapter 17: A Difference of Professional Opinion
Duration:00:08:20
Chapter 18: The Edge of the Page
Duration:00:06:41
Chapter 19: The Custodian and the Kid
Duration:00:07:07
Chapter 20: The Janitor's Patch
Duration:00:07:46
Chapter 21: Applied Custodial Arts
Duration:00:07:08
Chapter 22: The Apprentice
Duration:00:07:32
Chapter 23: Onboarding and Other Ontological Hazards
Duration:00:06:45
Chapter 24: The First Lesson
Duration:00:06:54
Chapter 25: The Taxonomy of Nuts and Bolts
Duration:00:07:58
Chapter 26: The Final Exam
Duration:00:07:10
Chapter 27: The Tidying
Duration:00:06:53
Chapter 28: A New Column on the Rota
Duration:00:07:03
Chapter 29: A Place for Trash
Duration:00:05:52
Chapter 30: Zoning Laws for a New Reality
Duration:00:06:57
Chapter 31: Furnishing the Void
Duration:00:07:23
Chapter 32: The First Page
Duration:00:07:15
Chapter 33: The Story Unfolds
Duration:00:06:41
Chapter 34: The Broken Block
Duration:00:07:49
Chapter 35: Scheduled Maintenance
Duration:00:06:01
Chapter 36: The Chore
Duration:00:07:20
Chapter 37: The Unfolding Quilt
Duration:00:06:56
Chapter 38: The Next Page
Duration:00:06:31
Chapter 39: The Gray Ledger
Duration:00:06:57
Chapter 40: Rebuilding the Tower
Duration:00:06:43
Chapter 41: Closing the Window
Duration:00:06:35
Chapter 42: A New Name on the Roster
Duration:00:06:50
Chapter 43: The First Withdrawal
Duration:00:06:57
Chapter 44: The Threshold
Duration:00:08:03
Chapter 45: The Welcome Mat
Duration:00:06:22
Chapter 46: The First Collection
Duration:00:06:06
Chapter 47: The First Entry
Duration:00:05:27
Chapter 48: The Catalog of the Cosmos
Duration:00:06:41
Chapter 49: The Echo Chamber
Duration:00:06:03
Chapter 50: The Trail of Gray
Duration:00:05:16
Chapter 51: The World That Forgot Red
Duration:00:07:06
Chapter 52: The Price of a Sunrise
Duration:00:06:04
Chapter 53: The Testimony of a Sunrise
Duration:00:04:57
Chapter 54: Following the Silence
Duration:00:06:36
Chapter 55: The Inspection
Duration:00:06:38
Chapter 56: The Processing Plant
Duration:00:06:00
Chapter 57: A Deliberate Spill
Duration:00:06:44
Chapter 58: The After-Action Report
Duration:00:06:30
Chapter 59: The First Mess
Duration:00:06:24
Chapter 60: The Vandalism of Hope
Duration:00:05:42
Chapter 61: The Audit
Duration:00:06:56
Chapter 62: The Work Order
Duration:00:05:58
Chapter 63: Conceptual Static
Duration:00:06:48
Chapter 64: The Sanitization Squad
Duration:00:05:43
Chapter 65: Hostile Tidying
Duration:00:07:02
Chapter 66: The Gift
Duration:00:06:09
Chapter 67: The Cleanup
Duration:00:05:43
Chapter 68: The Quiet World
Duration:00:06:32
Chapter 69: The First Story
Duration:00:05:59
Chapter 70: The Aftermath
Duration:00:05:25
Chapter 71: The Case of the Stolen Flavor
Duration:00:06:29
Chapter 72: A Single Drop of Sweetness
Duration:00:05:26
Chapter 73: The First Sip
Duration:00:05:32
Chapter 74: The Bureaucracy of a Collapsed Star
Duration:00:06:13
Chapter 75: The Proper Channels
Duration:00:05:38
Chapter 76: The Loophole in the Ledger
Duration:00:06:22
Chapter 77: A Signature from the Archives
Duration:00:06:10
Chapter 78: The Stacks
Duration:00:06:49
Chapter 79: The Withdrawal
Duration:00:06:50
Chapter 80: The Forgery
Duration:00:05:55
Chapter 81: The Paperwork Mountain
Duration:00:07:21
Chapter 82: The Statement of Intent
Duration:00:05:39
Chapter 83: The Biggest Mop
Duration:00:06:58
Chapter 84: The Return to the Library
Duration:00:05:12
Chapter 85: The Planet of Lost Socks
Duration:00:06:19
Chapter 86: The Fluffy Kingdom
Duration:00:06:09
Chapter 87: The Royal Audit
Duration:00:05:56
Chapter 88: The Sock's Story
Duration:00:06:31
Chapter 89: The Grand Opening
Duration:00:04:47
Chapter 90: A Table for Four (and a Half)
Duration:00:06:13
Chapter 91: The Menu
Duration:00:06:44
Chapter 92: The Special of the House
Duration:00:06:10
Chapter 93: The Check
Duration:00:04:58
Chapter 94: The First Toy
Duration:00:06:49
Chapter 95: The Work Order for a Family
Duration:00:05:35
Chapter 96: The House Call
Duration:00:05:54
Chapter 97: The Gray Room
Duration:00:06:07
Chapter 98: A Tidy Ending
Duration:00:05:26
Chapter 99: The Open Book
Duration:00:06:06
Chapter 100: The Unfinished Page
Duration:00:06:33
Chapter 101: The Librarian's Duty
Duration:00:05:17
Chapter 102: The Un-Retired
Duration:00:05:32
Chapter 103: The Last Chore on the List
Duration:00:06:40
Chapter 104: The Bookmobile
Duration:00:06:03