School of Self-Image

The Drama Triangle Explained: How to Reclaim Your Power The Drama Triangle, a concept developed by psychologist Stephen Karpman, illustrates how individuals can become entangled in a cycle of emotional exhaustion and conflict through three distinct roles: the victim, the rescuer, and the villain. Each role plays a significant part in perpetuating drama in our lives, often without our conscious awareness. Host Tonya Leigh explores the concept of the Drama Triangle, a framework that reveals the subconscious patterns we create in our lives. The discussion highlights how many people gravitate towards drama, whether for a sense of identity, adrenaline, or connection, often without realizing it. Tonya emphasizes that while some drama may serve a purpose, much of it keeps us trapped in familiar, chaotic states, preventing us from experiencing peace and ease in our lives. Tune in as we break down the three roles in the Drama Triangle—victim, villain, and hero—and how to recognize and escape these patterns to achieve a more elegant and fulfilling life. 00:47 - The Allure of Drama: Why We Create It 01:03 - Craving Peace and Elegance 02:09 - Role 1: The Victim 04:16 - The Victim's Self-Image 07:10 - Role 2: The Rescuer 09:50 - Examples of the Rescuer Role 11:07 - The Rescuer's Self-Image 16:00 - Role 3: The Villain 19:30 - Examples of the Villain Role 22:26 - The Villain's Self-Image 23:32 - Stepping Out of the Drama Triangle 24:03 - Becoming the Main Character Quotes: "What we crave is a sense of ease, a sense of peace, a sense of elegance in our lives, which means that we're going to have to give up some of the drama." "You're not the problem, but you are the solution." "If you want to grow your impact, if you want to have more ease in your life, you must be willing to let other people fail." "I'm only valuable when I'm needed." "The control, the criticism, and the blame comes from a fear of losing control, of not being enough, of being exposed." "You're the main character, but more importantly, you're also the writer and the director." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Clearing the Clutter: Transforming Your Self-Image for a New Season Spring is often associated with renewal and fresh beginnings, and this concept can be applied to our self-image as well. Just as we clean out our closets or declutter our homes, we can also take the time to refresh how we see ourselves and how we show up in the world. Host Tonya Leigh explores the concept of spring cleaning your self-image, much like we do with our homes. As nature begins to awaken from winter, it's the perfect time to reflect on how we perceive ourselves and make necessary changes for personal growth. The host invites listeners to embrace this season of renewal by clearing out old beliefs and habits that no longer serve them and to welcome in new, positive energy that aligns with the woman they're becoming. Join us as we discuss practical steps to refresh your self-image, create an environment that supports your evolution, and ignite your journey toward self-reinvention. Get ready to dive deep and transform your perspective this spring! Talking Points: 00:47 - A Time for Reinvention 02:02 - Identify the Area to Spring Clean 04:00 - Paint the Vision for Your After Story 07:10 - Clear the Clutter of Limiting Beliefs 12:21 - Bring in Fresh Energy and New Beliefs 20:02 - Protect the Space with Boundaries and Systems 27:52 - Elevate and Upgrade Your Environment Quotes: "Within each of us, we always have a new after story that's just waiting to be revealed, waiting to be experienced, waiting to be created, but you have to paint it first." "Identity is built in tiny decisions." "If you continue to do what you're doing for the next 10 years, are you going to like the result?" "My workouts go in my calendar like a meeting with my most important client because honestly, I am." "If you love this podcast, if it brings a spark of joy to your life, if it's helped you to navigate some challenging times." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Cultivating Quiet Confidence as a Woman In today's fast-paced world, power is often associated with loudness, dominance, and aggressive behavior. However, Tonya Leigh highlights a different perspective: quiet power, which is rooted in presence, certainty, and self-trust. This form of power is not about making noise or asserting oneself over others; rather, it embodies a calm and confident energy that naturally commands respect. The concept of "quiet power" and what it truly means to be a strong, influential woman without conforming to traditional expectations of dominance. Tonya reflects on her personal journey and how her quietness and feminine energy have often been misinterpreted as weaknesses. She shares insights on the importance of authenticity and self-trust, emphasizing that true power lies in being aligned with one’s true self rather than succumbing to external pressures. Join Tonya as she uncovers how to embrace your presence, influence without force, and become undeniably powerful in your own unique way. Talking Points: 01:42 - Misalignment and Loss of Power 04:25 - True Power and Insecurity 06:33 - Knowing Your Worth 11:04 - Acting Out of Character 14:49 - Rosa Parks' Quiet Defiance 18:24 - Unshakable Boundaries 22:07 - Importance of Emotional Management 26:04 - Dressing and Moving with Intentionality 28:29 - Embodying Quiet Power 30:22 - Taking Action Without Announcing Quotes: "If you are trying to be something that your soul is not in alignment with, if you are trying to be powerful in a way that doesn't feel true to you, there is going to be misalignment." "I am that quiet power. I have no interest in dominating you. I want us all to win together." "Her strength lay in her unshakable presence, her certainty, and her quiet refusal to be moved, literally and figuratively." "There's something magnetic about a woman who's in that energy that's just so in who she is, who's so present, who has nothing to prove and everything to give." "How would you dress, walk, and speak if you fully believed in your power?" "A woman with quiet power doesn't waste time talking about what she's going to do. She just does it." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

How to Stop Feeling Stuck in Self-Help Personal development is often viewed as a daunting task, laden with pressure to achieve specific milestones or conform to societal expectations. However, as discussed in the podcast episode, it should be approached as an invitation—a joyful endeavor that encourages you to discover and express the most vibrant version of yourself. Tonya Leigh explores the paradox of self-help: how even with the right resources and strategies, individuals can still feel stuck. She emphasizes that the way self-help is approached can significantly impact one's progress. Tonya shares insights from her recent quarterly retreat with her team, focusing on the concept of essentialism—doing less but with greater impact. She encourages listeners to examine their current practices, identifying what adds value and what may be holding them back. Join Tonya as she dives deeper into the pitfalls of self-help and offers actionable guidance to help you move forward on your personal development journey. Talking Points: 00:09 - Introduction: Feeling Stuck in Self-Help 01:52 - Why Self-Help Might Be Keeping You Stuck 02:44 - The Pressure to Go Bigger in Personal Development 05:03 - Shifting from Extraordinary to Signature Goals 08:05 - Obsessing Over Every Thought 11:07 - Constant Consumption Mode 15:02 - Taking Action to Reinforce Self-Image 17:10 - Belief That You Need to Be Fixed 20:03 - Personal Growth as an Invitation, Not an Obligation 21:51 - The Importance of Environment in Personal Development 25:32 - You Are Not Broken, You Are Whole Quotes: "If you're trying to expand into things that aren't for you, that really don't align with your values, that don't really light you up, it can feel very, very empty." "When your growth is aligned with your truth, it stops feeling like pressure and starts feeling like a privilege." "If you're just consuming and not putting what you learn into practice, all you have is a lot of unrealized knowledge." "When you let go of the idea that you're broken, everything will change." "Shouldn't personal growth be inspiring, not exhausting?" "Your surroundings can either reinforce a self-image that you desire or keep you stuck in an old identity." "News alert, you're not broken." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Transforming Your Self-Image: The Key to Attracting Effortless Love Your love story begins with self-love and an understanding of your own worth before seeking love from others. This foundational concept is beautifully illustrated in Tonya Leigh's podcast episode, where she shares her personal journey of transformation and the shifts in self-image that led her to a fulfilling relationship. Tonya Leigh shares her personal love story and the pivotal self-image shifts that led to her engagement. She explores the connection between self-worth and the quality of relationships, emphasizing that our experiences in love often reflect how we see ourselves. Tonya invites listeners to consider the lessons learned from past relationships and how they can apply these insights to foster more fulfilling connections. With a light-hearted tone, she encourages self-reflection and growth, reminding us that relationships are powerful mirrors of our inner world. Tune in for an inspiring discussion on attracting the love you deserve! Talking Points: 01:02 - Tonya's Love Story: Self-Image Shifts 03:08 - Part One: The Attraction Stage 05:07 - Embracing Alone Time: Self-Discovery 07:47 - Dating Mindset: Enjoying the Process 10:24 - Online Dating: Authentic Profiles 14:44 - Authenticity: Sharing Fears 17:34 - Part Two: The Partnership Stage 20:04 - Redefining Love: Beyond Hollywood Rom-Coms 23:10 - Enjoying the Journey: No Rush to Marry 25:07 - The Beginning of Love: Self-Love First 26:02 - Embodying Love Quotes: "I just allowed myself to cry and to grieve and to feel all of the feelings because I knew that if I didn't deal with that, I was just going to keep attracting more of the same." "I was open, but not attached. There was no rush, no timeline, no pressure." "I'm not going to abandon me to get someone else's approval." "I wasn't out there searching for love; I was fully immersed in a life that felt joyful and fulfilling." "His love is steady, strong, and unwavering. His love is a beautiful, masculine love. Strong yet soft." "Your love story doesn't begin when someone else enters into your life. It begins the moment you decide to love yourself deeply, unapologetically, and completely." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

The Power of Setting Boundaries and Trusting Yourself Managing other people's emotions is a common behavior that many individuals engage in, often with the intention of maintaining harmony and avoiding conflict. However, this habit can lead to significant negative consequences, including emotional exhaustion, resentment, and stifled personal growth for both yourself and those around you. Tonya Leigh explores the detrimental habit of managing other people's emotions and how it impacts our own happiness and growth. She discusses the importance of breaking free from the need to control how others feel, emphasizing that this behavior stifles both personal and collective development. Tonya shares her recent experience with guided visualization walks, which she refers to as immersion walks, and how they have positively shifted her energy and focus on vibrant well-being. By incorporating practices like Pilates, meditation, and self-care, she reveals how she is reclaiming her health and happiness. Join Tonya as she dives into strategies for cultivating emotional independence and nurturing your own well-being. Talking Points: 00:49 - Tonya's Self-Care Routine 02:15 - The Cost of Controlling Emotions 06:10 - Fear of Being the Bad Guy 09:02 - Loss of Self-Trust 12:27 - Self-Image and Managing Emotions 14:54 - Creating Your Own Safety 17:55 - Types of Emotional Management 23:28 - How to Stop Managing Emotions 25:17 - Setting Boundaries Without Guilt 25:50 - Building Emotional Resilience Quotes: "I want to challenge you to stop managing other people's emotions." "True belonging doesn't come from keeping everyone happy. It comes from being unapologetically yourself and trusting that the right people will love and accept you." "Recognizing it and having the courage to be true to yourself is where you begin to turn your life around." "I speak my truth with confidence and I let other people have their emotions and their opinions about it." "So you might as well be the version of you that you love." "Managing other people's emotions is not your job. Being the fullest, most authentic version of you, that is your job." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for the FREE Identity Code class Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Evolving Your Success: How to Let Go of Outdated Strategies In the journey of personal and professional development, individuals often rely on success strategies that have previously yielded positive results. However, as we evolve and our goals change, these strategies can become outdated and may even hinder our growth. Recognizing and letting go of these outdated success strategies is crucial for achieving new results and stepping into the next version of ourselves. Tonya Leigh explores the concept of breaking up with outdated success strategies that may have once propelled you to achievement but are now holding you back. She emphasizes the importance of recognizing what no longer serves you in order to evolve into your next best self. Tonya shares insights on how to identify these limiting beliefs and practices, and encourages listeners to embrace change for greater ease, confidence, and alignment in their lives. Tune in to discover how letting go of past strategies can lead to a more fulfilling and authentic path to success. Talking Points: 01:12 - Breaking Up with Your Success Strategy 03:32 - People Pleasing as a Success Strategy 06:14 - Inner Conflict with People Pleasing 08:02 - Building Walls for Protection 10:08 - Hitting a Ceiling with Current Strategies 11:04 - Breaking Down the 14 Success Strategies We Adopt 23:46 - Other Success Strategies 24:07 - Worry as a Success Strategy 25:32 - Breaking Up with Your Strategy 27:21 - Practical Experiments for Change 29:18 - Visualization and Growth 31:06 - Willingness to Burn Down Old Strategies Quotes: "What if the very thing that has made you successful is now the very thing keeping you stuck?" "I'm going to have to burn down my success strategy in order to create what it is that I see in my mind in order for me to have the impact that I know I am here to make." "I have been willing to break up with my success strategy of people pleasing." "You've got to break up with your risk aversion." "I want to invite all of us to consider success strategies that are fun, expansive, and full of ease." "Are you willing to burn down your current success strategy to see what's possible for you?" "To create something you've never had, you're going to have to become someone you've never been." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for the FREE Identity Code class Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Unlocking Joy: How to Cultivate Excitement in Your Everyday Life Creating a life that excites you begins with understanding your core values and identifying what truly makes you feel alive. This foundational work is essential for living a fulfilling and joyful life. Tonya Leigh explores the transformative power of mindset and how it shapes our experiences in life. She emphasizes that excitement and fulfillment come not from luck or perfect circumstances, but from the mindset we choose each day. Tonya shares her personal joy as she celebrates her mom's 80th birthday and reflects on the importance of simple moments with loved ones. Additionally, she announces an upcoming free class titled "The Identity Code," aimed at helping women shift from merely taking action to embodying the mindset of success. Tune in to discover how to become the person who naturally attracts and creates the life you desire. Talking Points: 00:13 - The Power of Mindset 01:23 - Upcoming Free Class: The Identity Code 02:28 - How to Be Excited About Your Day 04:25 - Clarify Your Values 06:12 - Discover What Makes You Feel Alive 08:39 - Evaluate What You Are Tolerating 09:24 - Stop Complaining 11:31 - Set Exciting Goals 14:03 - Surround Yourself with Positive People 18:01 - Embrace Curiosity and Adventure 22:58 - Balance Vision and Presence 23:39 - Change Up Your Environment 25:06 - Start Your Day with Intention 26:20 - Be the Source of Your Own Excitement Quotes: "The secret isn't in doing more, it's in becoming the woman who naturally creates and attracts what it is that she wants." "So many people are just living lives on default." "You don't get what you want, you get what you tolerate." "Excitement and complaining don't coexist together." "What surrounds you seeps into you." "Wake up. This is our one life. Don't be stagnant." "I want to see myself as a woman who really loved life, who loved all of it, even the hard parts, because she knew that that grew her." "I realized I get to be the excitement." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for the FREE Identity Code class Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Unmasking Your True Self: Discovering Freedom Beyond the Faux Self When we operate from our faux self, we may find ourselves making choices based on what we think we should want or what will garner approval from others. This can manifest in various ways, such as pursuing a career that looks good on paper but does not fulfill us, or acquiring material possessions to impress others rather than to satisfy our own desires. Tanya shares the story of a client who felt trapped in a high-paying job that brought her no joy, illustrating how the faux self can lead to a life that feels suffocating and unfulfilling. Tonya explores the profound question, "Who are you really?" She shares her morning routine and the productivity that comes with starting the day early. She introduces a life-changing concept she learned from Martha Beck during her coach training: the distinction between the social self and the essential self. This episode delves into how understanding this concept can empower listeners to shift from feeling like victims of their circumstances to becoming creators of their own lives, our own true identities and explores the origins of their self-perceptions, prompting a deeper exploration of personal authenticity. Tune in for insights that could transform your understanding of yourself and your potential. Talking Points: 00:52 -Social Self vs. Essential Self 04:06 - Defining the Worldly Woman 08:47 - The Role of the Faux Self in Success 10:20 - True Desires vs. Faux Desires 14:05 - True Desires and Money 18:04 - Childhood Memories and True Self 22:02 - True Self and the Win-Win Approach 25:03 - The Challenge of Sudden Change 27:00 - The Work of Getting Back to Your Authentic Self Quotes: "I felt like I was at the effect of my life versus being the creator of my life." "There is no freedom when the faux self is in control." "To find someone who is fully in their true self is such a rarity because it takes so much courage and a lot of people won't like you." "You will know your truth because it will taste like freedom." "Would you rather be judged for being real or praised for being fake?" 00:28:49 - "Who am I really at my core? Who am I beyond my roles as a mother, as a daughter, as a wife, as a business owner?" Useful Resources: Click HERE for the Live Like an Editor Workshop Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

From Burnout to Empowerment: How One Woman Took Control of Her Story In the journey of personal growth, particularly when grappling with feelings of isolation and burnout, the significance of surrounding oneself with supportive individuals cannot be overstated. Caroline Lacaille-Gaudy's experience, as shared in the podcast episode, underscores the importance of having a network that fosters growth and provides a sense of belonging. In this episode of the School of Self-Image, host Tonya Leigh welcomes Caroline, who shares her transformative journey after leaving a successful corporate career in late 2021. Caroline discusses how she learned to become the editor in chief of her own life, empowering herself to create meaningful changes. Since embracing this mindset, she has launched two purpose-driven businesses, published a book on Amazon, and enhanced her relationships as a mother and wife. Caroline’s inspiring story highlights the importance of living intentionally and provides insights on how to stop reacting to life’s twists and instead, start creating your own narrative. Join Tonya andd Caroline as they explore the tools and mindset shifts that can help you stop living life by default and start creating it intentionally. Plus, learn more about the upcoming Live Like an Editor workshop. Talking Points: 00:22 - Caroline's Achievements Post-Corporate Career 01:21 - Corporatte Burnout 02:57 - Feeling Unfulfilled Despite Success 04:06 - Realization of Misalignment with Motherhood 06:22 - Living Life by Default 08:45 - Shifting Perspectives and Addressing Objections 11:44 - Becoming a Coach and Finding Purpose 15:02 - Being the Editor-in-Chief of Your Life 18:15 - Caroline's Word for the Year: Expansive 21:07 - Learning Through Stories 24:06 - Unpacking Past Experiences 27:43 - Realization of Isolation 30:07 - Managing Spousal Stress 34:00 - Impact of Learning Tools on Parenting 37:56 - Belief in Possibility and Daily Habits 43:30 - Teaching Gratitude to Daughter 46:11 - Advice for Burnt Out Women Quotes: "I had been following this path of success, ticking the boxes, having the wonderful office with the view and the title and the car... and yet it felt like there was always something missing." "Knowing that I'm in control of my emotional state of being is the most liberating news ever." "How would bold me, how would worthy me, how would discipline me... behave right now?" "It's OK to have certain standards. It's OK to ask for certain things. It's OK to behave such a way." "It's the books on your bookshelf. It's the music you listen to. It's the clutter or not clutter, depending on how you keep your home, all of it is sending a message to you about who you think you are." "I switched from fixing to, I get to create, I get to create myself. It's a very different energy." "A well-lived life is nothing more than a collection of well-lived days." "There is no hurry. My favorite mantra." Useful Resources: Click HERE for the Live Like an Editor Workshop Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel Connect with Caroline: Click HERE for Caroline’s Website Click HERE for Bliss by Caroline

Live Like an Editor: Transforming Your Life with Vision and Creativity In the journey of personal development, one of the most transformative shifts you can make is to curate your life by focusing on potential rather than flaws. This perspective not only empowers you but also allows you to see the beauty and possibilities in your current circumstances. Here’s how you can implement this mindset in your life. Tonya Leigh invites listeners to reimagine their lives through a designer's lens. Inspired by the idea of viewing life as a fixer-upper, she encourages embracing one's potential rather than focusing on flaws. Tonya shares her recent experiences, including a snowy morning and a revitalizing Pilates class, setting a positive tone for the discussion. She also announces her beloved annual workshop, "Live Like an Editor," a transformative five-day experience designed to help participants gain a fresh perspective on their lives. This workshop emphasizes creativity, possibility, and joy, rather than fixing perceived flaws, empowering women to curate their lives with intention. Tune in to discover how to approach personal development with style and creativity! Talking Points: 00:39 - Morning Routine and Excitement 01:22 - Live Like an Editor Workshop 02:05 - Possibility, Creativity, and Joy 04:24 - Curate Your Life Like a Designer 05:05 - Perspective Shift: See Potential, Not Flaws 07:10 - Thoughtfully Select and Organize 07:54 - Transform Possibilities into Reality 11:09 - Create a Vision and Anchor It 14:00 -Work with What You Have 17:48 - Focus Room by Room 21:10 - Cultivate a Figure-Outable Mindset 26:11 - Perspectives to Curate Your Life Quotes: "When you curate your life like a designer, you look at possibility." "Being a designer means seeing potential where others see limitations." "You're afraid of choosing the wrong thing to work towards, and so therefore it's just easier to pretend that you don't know and you're confused about it because then you don't have to take action." "You've got to start with where you are and with what you have." "If you could choose one area of your life to focus on this year that would have the biggest impact on the rest of your life, where would you focus?" "When you think like a designer, you know that every challenge has a solution." "The quality of your life really does depend on the quality of your questions." Useful Resources: Click HERE for the Live Like an Editor Workshop Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Transforming 'Should' into 'Desire': A Journey to Self-Discovery The word "should" carries significant weight in our lives, often representing obligation and criticism. In this podcast episode, Tonya Leigh explores the profound impact that this single word can have on our mental and emotional well-being. When we use "should," it typically conveys a sense of duty or correctness, suggesting that there is a right way to do things. This inherent judgment can lead to feelings of shame and guilt, ultimately hindering our personal growth and fulfillment. She shares a relatable story about a listener named Jeanette, who eagerly anticipates Tonya's annual Live Like an Editor workshop as a tool for success. Tonya emphasizes the importance of breaking free from the cycle of "shoulds" that keep us playing small and reflects on her decision to take January for deep reflection before diving into the new year. Tune in to discover strategies for overcoming the pressure of expectations and embracing your true desires. Talking Points: 00:32 - Breaking Free from "Shoulds" 01:56 - Reflecting on the New Year 03:31 - The Concept of "Should Season" 05:09 - Definition of "Should" and Its Implications 08:00 - The Harm of "Should" in Personal Growth 10:24 - Internal "Shoulds" and Self-Criticism 13:31 - The Pressure of Societal Expectations 16:14 - The Paradox of Self-Acceptance 19:25 - The Body Test for True Desires 23:32 - Building a Life Based on True Desires 24:56 - Conclusion: Embracing True Desires Quotes: "It's when shame and guilt becomes your compass instead of desire being your guide." "To argue with reality is to argue with God and you only lose 100% of the time." "The curious paradox is when I accept myself as I am, then I can change." "It's only when I've gotten in touch with my true desires and made those the goals that I have had years where I felt excited, where I felt aligned, where I felt like I was moving towards my own North Star." "If you are building a life off of fear and shame shoulds, you are going to be building a prison for yourself." "Your desires are never wrong. They're simply showing you the way home to yourself." Useful Resources: Click HERE for Five Essential Quesions Click HERE for the FREE Shake-Up List Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

The Shake Up List: 99 Daring Ways to Live Life Differently To break free from monotony and stagnation, it is essential to engage in new experiences, meet new people, and expose ourselves to different ideas and activities. This concept is central to the discussion in the podcast episode, where Tonya Leigh emphasizes the importance of shaking things up in our lives to foster personal growth and transformation. Tonya explores the theme of breaking free from the monotony of everyday life. She acknowledges the feelings of being in a rut that many women experience, even when life seems perfectly fine on the surface. She emphasizes the importance of shaking things up to step into new possibilities and change and discusses how repetitive routines can solidify a self-image that keeps us stuck. Join Tonya as she invites you to embrace change and discover new ways to invigorate your life. Talking Points: 00:42 - Embracing Change and Possibilities 03:01 - Balancing Routine with New Challenges 04:15 -The Shake Up List 08:00 - The Benefits of Unplugged Time 11:03 - Experimenting with New Approaches 14:08 - Following Curiosity 20:26 - Creative Momentum 22:45 - Empowering Yourself to Shake Things Up Quotes: "Shaking up your life is doing things differently." "I've realized that my best ideas and biggest breakthroughs often come when I'm not actively pursuing them." "Follow your curiosity. Follow what lights you up. Follow those little glimmers." "Something within me, my intuition spoke to me and said, yes, this is the next step for you." "There's nothing like a party to shake up your life." "The truth is we all have the power to shake up our lives at any moment." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Click HERE for the FREE Shake Up List Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Transform Your Year with Intentional Living Choosing a "Word of the Year" is a powerful practice that can significantly enhance personal development and focus intentions throughout the year. This concept, as discussed in the podcast episode, revolves around selecting a single word that embodies the qualities and aspirations one wishes to cultivate in their life. Host Tonya Leigh reflects on the transformative power of simplifying life to create more meaningful experiences. After feeling overwhelmed by a packed schedule and material possessions, she poses a pivotal question: "What if I could do less but better?" This introspection leads her to select a guiding word for the year that embodies elegance, intentionality, and refined living. Tonya shares her journey of unplugging from work during the holidays, highlighting the importance of renewal and self-care. Join her as she explores the art of pursuing a beautiful life through intentional choices and a focus on quality over quantity. Talking Points: 00:31 - The Transformative Question 02:09 - Reflecting on Last Year 03:03 - Choosing the Word of the Year 04:08 - Importance of Deep Reflection 07:07 - Turning Frustrations into Opportunities 08:02 - The Concept of Essentialism 10:10 - Greg McCowan's Book on Essentialism 12:08 - The Impact of Too Many Choices 15:00 - Behind the Scenes of a Successful Business 17:01 - Applying Essentialism to All Areas of Life 17:55 - Questions for Exploring Essentialism Quotes: "What if I could do less but better?" "I made all of those decisions that led to me being in this moment with a lot of things to get done today." "Last year's frustrations are this year's opportunities." "It isn't about deprivation. It's about elevation. It's the art of elegant elimination." "Luxury is different for all of us. It does not mean designer handbags. It's a feeling." "There's something about this word that has convicted me at the deepest, deepest level." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Click HERE for 2025 Essential Questions Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Looking Back, Living Now, and Celebrating the Future: A New Year’s Practice The "champagne mindset" is a transformative approach to life that encourages individuals to celebrate not only their successes but also the challenges they face. This mindset is rooted in the understanding that both victories and obstacles are essential components of personal growth and resilience. As we welcome the year 2025, Tonya shares her personal New Year's tradition of celebrating intentionally, emphasizing the importance of rewiring our brains to focus on positivity and possibility. She explains how our thoughts shape our focus and, ultimately, our lives. By embracing the champagne mindset, which combines celebration with resilience, listeners are encouraged to seek out extraordinary moments in everyday life and to celebrate both challenges and victories. Tune in to discover how this mindset can shift your perspective and enhance your journey towards your biggest goals. Talking Points: 00:41 - Reflecting on the Past Year 02:06 - Defining the Champagne Mindset 04:14 - Growth Through Challenges 06:00 - Authentic Goals and Self-Image 07:04 - Celebrating the Past 08:09 - Celebrating the Present 09:40 - The Science of Focus and Abundance 12:23 - The Be-Do-Have Model 14:09 - Taking Control of Your Story 15:03 - Celebrating the Future 19:00 - Aligning Actions with Future Success 20:06 - The Champagne Mindset in Practice 21:40 - Writing and Editing Your Life Story Quotes: "I call this the champagne mindset. It is an approach to life that combines celebration with resilience." "To create something you've never had, you have to become someone you've never been." "The more you celebrate life, the more life celebrates you." "You have to take control of your story. You have to take control of your narrative." "The brain has a difficulty distinguishing between vivid imagination and reality." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Embracing Enoughness: Transforming Your Mindset This Holiday Season An abundant self-image is fundamentally rooted in the belief that one's worth is expansive, regenerative, and independent of external validation or accomplishments. This perspective shifts the focus from a scarcity mindset—where individuals often feel inadequate or insufficient—to an empowering understanding of self-worth that is inherent and limitless. In this special Christmas Day episode of the School of Self-Image, host Tonya Leigh shares her heartfelt reflections on abundance and gratitude. After a morning of journaling, Tonya expresses her desire for every woman to experience the overwhelming joy she felt while making her morning coffee. Instead of a tangible gift, she emphasizes the importance of a mindset shift, proposing that the greatest gift she can offer is an abundant self-image. Join Tonya as she dives into the transformative power of self-perception and how it can lead to a more fulfilling life. Happy holidays! Talking Points: 00:32 - Christmas Day Reflections 01:26 - The Gift of an Abundant Self-Image 02:08 - Understanding Scarcity Mindset 03:01 - Shifting Focus to Abundance 05:57 - Physical Presence and Self-Image 07:02 - Relationships and Boundaries 09:29 - Expressing Needs 11:21 - Holding Multiple Truths 13:27 - Trusting Intuition 14:12 - Taking Risks Without Guarantees 16:09 - Aligning Opportunities with Values 18:38 - Spending with an Abundant Mindset 19:09 - Generosity Without Depletion 20:04 - New Year Wishes Quotes: "If I could walk up to your door, knock on it and give you a box and you open it, this year I would want that gift to be an abundant self image." "To me, they are proving the enoughness that I am wanting, that I am looking for." "An abundant self-image is you having the understanding of what you need and articulating that in a way that others then understand it." "Choosing based on what lights you up. That's such an abundant energy." "To me, it's also about investing in your personal growth without needing to justify every penny." "An abundant self-image is a woman who sees herself as enough, who sees the world as having enough, and who shows up in that state of enoughness." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

From Postpartum Struggles to Unstoppable Confidence: A Conversation with Ellison Ward The significance of setting small, achievable goals emerges as a vital strategy for fostering confidence and momentum in personal development in this candid coversation with Ellison Ward. Ellison shares her transformative journey from feeling overwhelmed and trapped in a cycle of inactivity to embracing incremental changes that reshaped her life. Tonya Leigh welcomes Ellison Ward to discuss the transformative power of reinvention. Ellison shares her personal journey of overcoming postpartum depression and the struggles she faced in rediscovering herself. Tonya and Ellison explore the importance of community and support during times of change, highlighting how the School of Self-Image has played a pivotal role in Ellison's transformation. This episode offers inspiration and practical insights for women looking to embrace their own journeys of self-reinvention. Tune in to hear Ellison's remarkable story and learn how you too can embark on the path to rediscovery and empowerment. Talking Points: 00:31 - Ellison Ward's After Story 01:02 - Meeting Ellison in London 01:22 - Ellison's Background and Struggles 04:09 - The Challenge of Taking the First Step 04:47 - Overwhelmed and Anxious Feelings 07:48 - Advice for Women Feeling Stuck 10:12 - Building Confidence Through Small Wins 11:06 - The Importance of Community 13:08 - Identifying Limiting Beliefs 14:02 - Overcoming People-Pleasing 16:19 - Influence of Ellison's Grandmother 17:01 - Shifting Focus from Past to Future 19:34 - Echo Effect of Achieving One Goal 23:07 - Focusing on Energy and Health 24:58 - Enjoying Life's Pleasures 25:47 - Mastering Your Day 26:33 - Gratitude and Future Plans Quotes: "I thought, sink or swim, I gotta do this. There's no excuse." "I set small goals... those small goals get you to the big, and then you don't feel overwhelmed." "You just need one person in your life that offers you a possibility that you never thought would be possible." "Sometimes they want to fight with me on it. And I'm like, listen, you're going to thank me later." "If you want to master your life, master your day." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Never Say Never: Rediscovering Joy in Everyday Moments Visualization is a powerful tool that can shape our reality by guiding us toward opportunities and success. By holding positive visions in our minds and allowing our brains to filter relevant information, we can create a pathway to achieving our dreams. Tonya Leigh's insights remind us that the journey is just as important as the destination, and by embracing the process with patience and excitement, we can manifest the life we desire. She shares her five biggest lessons from 2024 and emphasizes the importance of taking time to assess the past year and intentionally plan for the future, highlighting the significance of visualization as a tool for shaping reality. Tonya discusses her recent experiences while working on her upcoming membership and the annual workshop, The Curated Year, where members come together to plan and learn from their past. Join her for insightful reflections and practical takeaways to carry into the next year! Talking Points: 00:35 - Tonya's Five Biggest Lessons of 2024 01:08 - Annual Workshop: The Curated Year 01:29 - Reflecting on Last Year's Lessons 01:51 - The Power of Visualization 05:05 - Never Say Never 09:02 - Patience and Playing the Long Game 14:21 - Knowing Your Core Values 16:30 - It's Never as Hard as You Think 21:08 - It's Okay for People to Be Upset 24:34 - Looking Forward to New Lessons Quotes: "Dreaming and visualizing aren't just wishful thinking. They're powerful tools for shaping your reality." "There is power to visualizing what it is that you want and then letting go of how or if it's going to happen." "Life isn’t linear. It’s more cyclical. You may find yourself coming back to parts of yourself that you thought were long gone, but you’ve missed." "If you find yourself out of alignment, I want you to think about, do you know what your core values are?" "I want to see myself as capable of doing hard things and being a woman who is true to herself, who's authentic." Useful Resources: Click HERE for my FREE Calm Meditation Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

From Overwhelm to Calm: Redefining Your Holiday Season The holiday season often brings a whirlwind of activities, expectations, and societal pressures that can lead to feelings of overwhelm and stress. However, by embracing the concept of holiday essentialism, you can transform your experience into one that is joyful and fulfilling. This approach encourages you to focus on what truly brings you joy while letting go of obligations that do not serve you. Inspired by Greg McCowan's book "Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less," which encourages focusing on fewer but more meaningful activities, Tonya challenges listeners to ask themselves three key questions: She discusses the societal expectations that can turn what should be a joyful time into a marathon of obligations. Tune in to discover how to shift your mindset and focus on what truly matters this holiday season, embracing the simple joys and calm instead of the chaos. Talking Points: 01:09 - Holiday Overwhelm and Societal Pressures 02:13 - Fear of Disappointing Others 04:36 - What is Essentialism? 05:39 - Question 1: What Truly Brings Me Joy? 06:34 - Question 2: What Am I Doing Just Because I Think I Have To? 07:50 - Question 3: What Memories Do I Want to Create? 08:33 - Shifting from Excess to Intention 09:55 - Editing Ruthlessly 14:06 - Mindfulness and Being Present 17:02 - Secret Santa and Charitable Giving 18:04 - Simplifying the Holidays 23:10 - Setting Boundaries for Social Commitments 24:03 - Prioritizing Connection Over Perfection 24:13 - Setting Intentions for the Holiday Season Quotes: "If holidays are not your thing, especially around this time of year, I challenge you to skip it altogether." "The shift in mindset with holiday essentialism is to move from access to intention and from pleasing others to cherishing moments." "Just because you've done something for years doesn't mean you have to continue doing it." "The holidays are not a performance and you don't have to be performative." "Shed the souffle. Seriously, let her go. You don't need to do it." "What people remember is how you made them feel." Useful Resources: Click HERE for my FREE Calm Meditation Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Finding Joy in Life's Challenges: The Uncommon Gratitude Practice In our daily lives, we often encounter individuals who trigger strong emotional responses in us—whether it’s frustration, anger, or discomfort. The common reaction is to distance ourselves from these people, believing that cutting them out will provide relief. However, as discussed in the podcast episode, this approach may lead to missed opportunities for profound personal growth. In this episode of the School of Self-Image, host Tonya Leigh explores the profound lessons that can be learned from the things we often take for granted, complain about, or try to avoid in our daily lives. As Thanksgiving approaches, Tonya emphasizes the importance of gratitude and celebration, arguing that these practices should extend beyond just one day a year. She reflects on how embracing gratitude has been a transformative principle in her life, helping her navigate challenges and create a life she loves. Drawing from a recent workshop, she shares insights on staying connected to our celebrations, highlighting how they can foster personal growth and joy. Join Tonya as she invites listeners to recognize and appreciate the unexpected sources of wisdom in their lives. Talking Points: 00:40 - Thanksgiving and Gratitude 02:06 - The Power of Celebration 03:11 - Practicing Gratitude in Hard Times 03:43 - People Who Trigger Us 07:04 - Learning from Triggers 10:06 - Embracing Failures 12:35 -Daily Annoyances 16:00 - Future Gratitude 22:34 - Showing Up for Your Dreams Quotes: "Gratitude has become a practice that I especially use during my hardest times." "I have come to view these people as my biggest teachers. I like to call them my pets. They're my personal emotional trainers." "I think the answer is to lean into it so we can learn from it and grow from it." "A lot of the lessons that we need to learn are going to be learned in the mistakes, not in the successes." "The next time you're annoyed, just ask yourself, is there anything in this that I could be grateful for?" "I have found that the anticipation is even better than the arrival." "If you come across just one podcast and you learn something that changes your life, I will feel like I have served my mission in life." "Be a woman who shows up for her dreams." Useful Resources: Click HERE to join the Curated Year Workshop Click HERE to join the Membership Click HERE for a FREE download Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel